Thursday, January 31, 2008

Dear Hillary Clinton,

Dear HRC,

In my effort to become a more educated voter I was surfing through your website looking at the issues that you feel are the most compelling in today's USA. One of the topics you addressed was the sagging economy and specifically, the subprime loan blowup. I see that your plan is to 1) ask for a 90 day moritorium on foreclosures, 2) freeze adjustable rates for at least 5 years and 3) get regular status reports on giving people mortgages that work for them so that we can have "real accountability." I think your plan is great - as long as I get a piece of the action.

See the thing is that my wife and I bought a new home in mid-2007. Well actually we put money down on the home around Thanksgiving 2006 and then moved in last year. When we made the decision to buy the home we knew that home prices were on the decline and that the economy may have trouble brewing, but we tried to accurately evaluate our risk and decided that we would still go forward. We liked our home and, most importantly, we felt like our home was one that we could afford and live in for a substantial period of time.

When it came time to get a loan, which as it turns out was only a month or so before the subprime loan crisis arose out of the shadows, we thought that getting an ARM (adjustable rate mortgage) would probably be irresponsible. It just seemed too risky. So although ARM rates were significantly lower than our 30 year fixed rate mortgage, we thought we would be doing the smart, responsible thing. But know I realize that I was being dumb.

Had I known at the time we bought our house that I could buy a home that was much larger AND more costly AND sign up for a teaser mortgage rate on an ARM with the knowledge that the teaser rate would last for 7-10 years, even though it's only supposed to just a short period of time, I would have done that. I am pretty dumb to think that I should take a little bit of personal responsibility myself when I know darn well that I can overreach and my government will pick me up. My favorite part of your plan is point 3 where it says that my mortgage company has to give you an update on how well its doing to get me in a mortgage that fits my needs or else it is going to get in trouble for not being accountable.

Hillary, I realize I am not endorsing you for President yet, but I just hope that you'll keep my plight in mind. I'm getting the shaft here. Will you please let me go out and get a teaser rate mortgage? Can it please last for 7-10 years? I really need to blow more money I don't have on things I don't need, but I just don't want to have to take responsibility for my own decisions. Can't the government do that for me?

Sincerely yours,

Tad Davis
Concerned Citizen and Voter

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Predictions 2008: A Year of Change

2008 is shaping up to be a year of change. Yeah, I know that phrase sounds like all I do is listen to Mitt Romney, or Barack Obama (see quote at top), or Hillary Clinton. Curiously, John McCain doesn't have anything about change on his website, otherwise I might have listened to him too.

I suppose our changes probably won't be as epic as these Presidential candidates' grandstanding, but they just might be more substantive. So just for kicks we're rolling out our predictions for 2008. I suppose it may be cheating to be predicting the course of the year when we have the head start of 27 days of 2008 down already. After all, who could have ever forseen that more people would vote for "Nobody" than Dennis Kucinich in the Michigan presidential primary election? And yet the campaign continues. Has anyone told that guy that you get more than a participant ribbon at the end of this thing? (What's that? Oh, I guess he finally quit.)

Anyway, here are my 2008 predictions:

I will keep up my goal to post at least 5 times a month. This is always kind of difficult for me because I try to make each blog post count. I could just slap down any old thing like, "Look at this Hannah Montana couch Kleenex box cover I found on eBay." but I expect a little more of myself. Plus, if I don't end up writing here I feel a drain in creative energy. But I am supremely confident that I can do this because I have a secret weapon...monkeys.

Yes, that's right. We purchased a thousand monkeys and a thousand typewriters and soon we will have both the great American novel and killer blog posts. The first monkey is done now. He writes, "It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times." You stupid monkey.

I will resume taking second place in fantasy baseball. For years I have played fantasy baseball in a variety of forms. Sometimes I've played in a rotisserre league, sometimes a points league, and sometimes a head-to-head league. Most of the time I get the same result - second place. I have more second place finishes than the Buffalo Bills. But last year broke my streak. I took first. I joined some general Yahoo fantasy league with a bunch of people I didn't know and I ended up winning. In the other league I played in I finished fourth - despite destroying everyone in the regular season. I can't say I'm really happy to go back to taking second, but hopefully my prediction will go wrong (in a good way.)

We will take on Dave Ramsey's advice. To those of you wondering who Dave Ramsey is, he's a fairly ordinary guy who has fairly common sense financial advice which when followed yields extraodrinary results. His advice boils down to this - put yourself in a good financial position. I highly recommend his book The Total Money Makeover. Even if you're doing well financially it's nice to just read some good common sense advice on the subject.

Sports Predictions:

Super Bowl: New England Patriots

World Series: Detriot Tigers

NBA Championship (not that anyone cares): Phoenix Suns

NHL Stanley Cup: Stanley Steemers (They've got the name on their side)

NCAA Men's Basketball: Witchita State Shockers

McKay will be talking like he kissed the Blarney Stone. McKay is already determined to try and talk, he just hasn't figured out too many words. But what he has figured out he does with great success. He knows his little brother's name is "Dibby," or "Giddy," or "Diddy." He knows "Daddy" and "Mommy." And he also knows a lot about animals. McKay's already trying to share that knowledge with his little brother by reading him the animal book and making all the sounds.



2008 will be good. Why? I don't know - call it a hunch. All I know is that Teri and I are excited to start another year of being together with our cute little boys. What could be better?

Monday, January 21, 2008

In Loving Memory...Crabman

(I really wrote this post in September but I didn't know how to complete it with a video. Now, obviously, I do. So despite the somewhat dated pictures the content should still be reasonably informative.)

If there is a time of day that you know McKay looks forward to, it would have to be bath time. Eating is great. Sleeping can be good or bad. But bath time is always a winner.



When McKay first was able to play in the bath tub somewhat independently we bought him a few bath toys. As it turned out, McKay thought they were all cool, but took an especially strong liking to the small crab. He carried that crab everywhere - not just to the tub. Crabman, as we affectionately dubbed him, went with us to church, on trips, and basically anywhere that McKay went.



Teri and I always knew that if McKay got upset, Crabman's even keeled temperament could always cheer Baby K up. I suppose it probably had more to do with the fact that Crabman was made out of a rubbery plastic which made him perfect for massaging K's achy gums, but then again I wouldn't discount the crab's personality either.



In the end, I think Teri and I started liking Crabman just as much as McKay. I definitely noticed a soft spot in my heart for the little guy, perhaps more out of the fond memories that he brought back to mind than anything else, but I did have fun playing with him too. After his several month infatuation with our crustacean friend, McKay moved on to bigger, better, shinier, blinkier, and noisier things.


(Does this video not show up for you? Click here to watch it.)

Crabman still entertained at bath time, but it was as if his prominent role in our lives had been reduced to a non-speaking cameo on Baywatch. (Interestingly enough, one of my mission companions was the brother of Kelly Packard - a Baywatch lifeguard).

It seemed that Crabman's sparkling personality lacked spark. His sense of pizazz was missing some of its piz - or maybe its azz. Crabman was starting to go the way of all those toys you hear about in Toy Story, once loved and now forgotten.

Despite McKay's fickleness for rubberized friends, I still thought Crabman was cool. And so it was sad one day when I discovered in the middle of McKay's bath that it appeared some of McKay's toys were starting to get moldy on the inside. It was that day that we lost Mr. Turtle and sadly Crabman.

So here's to you Crabman. Although your rubber soul no longer dwells with us your memory will always linger. Your body probably will probably always linger too, but it will be hanging out with a bunch of other moldy toys in some place that probably doesn't smell too good. As you make your way there we send you off with this haiku.

Googley eyes and
pincers to suck on have made
a friend of McKay.

We love you man!

(P.S. Last week Teri and McKay were at Target when McKay started doing his excited caveman noise. It goes, "oooooh. oooooh." Teri turned and was trying to figure out what he wanted and kept pointing at different things to no avail. McKay didn't want rubber duckies, sippy cups, or commemorative Star Wars action figures, he wanted something else. Finally Teri followed his gaze to a small pack of bath tub animals. McKay had seen his long lost buddy and wanted him back. So now we have Crab Man II. Here's hoping there's less mold this time.)

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Best of 2007

Like many people who write things down for other people to read, I feel compelled to offer a Best of 2007 list. But unlike other people's lists, I know from the start that the information I am presenting is totally worthless. Well, I take that back. My best things about 2007 are things that I found interesting, funny, or worth taking note of. Depending on what you think of me, it may or may not be worthless.

Best YouTube Video I Have Not Shared on my Blog in 2007
This one is easy. I've been saving this video for a long time knowing that its day would come. It's odd that it makes the cut here, but it's great.



This clip gets funnier every time you watch. Notice the "I'm awesome" grunt at the beginning and the fact that the first question someone asks is "Are you ok?" to which one of his posse members says, "No, he's not."

Best TV Show to Replace all the Shows Currently on Strike
I'm not a big fan of reruns, unless of course I haven't seen the original run in the first place. Such is the case with ESPN Classic's Cheap Seats, a sports version of Mystery Science Theater. (To see the complete hilarious Mystery Science version of the awful movie Time Chasers just look at the links on YouTube. The movie is divided into 10 parts.)

While I can only vouch for the Cheap Seats episodes that I have seen they are pretty funny. Some of you may remember the commercial for Tom Emanski's Defensive Drills. I wanted to link it here, but despite my diligent efforts I couldn't find it anywhere. As a funny ESPN commentary on the commercial explains, the 1991 commercial features Fred McGriff, a then young and talented baseball player wearing a ridiculous Baseball World hat, who promised that this particular drill video gets results. The commercial is still on TV today although if you watch late night ESPN you already know that.

Cheap Seats took a cheap shot at the commercial after their segment on the Thailand tradition of Elephant soccer. Apparently once a year their is an elephant festival in which one of the games is elephant soccer. Villages compete against each other as they ride elephants and try to get them to kick a giant soccer ball. (Dallas, if you know more please fill me in.) After showing ESPN's coverage of the 0 - 0 tie, Cheap Seats then showed this commercial - a parody of Tom Emanski's baseball drills ad. You have to love Johnny Damon, a career .288 hitter (in baseball), touting the awesome elephant soccer training techniques.



One downside though - I just found out that Cheap Seats actually ended in 2006. So set your Tivo for midnight on ESPN Classic, or whenever it airs, and at least enjoy the reruns. By the way, unlike most network commericial breaks where commercials last 3 minutes or more, Cheap Seats usually only has 2 minute commerical breaks. That's important if you use the 30-second fast forward like I do.

Best Catch Phrase
This one requires a preface. My father-in-law works for Thatcher High School and is one of the replacement bus drivers when a regular driver is out, sick, or otherwise indisposed. It is from this bus driver background that my father-in-law got his new motto.

"Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver."

This phrase narrowly beats out his other new catch phrase. "Never throw a kid out the window of the bus without first attaching a safety rope around their neck."

Best Hard Won Prize
As a frequent reader of the blog you are undoubtedly aware that Jared and I were leading in the Mesa City Winter Tennis League. To further update you, we won the league. Check out my hard won winnings!



I ended up giving my shirt to Teri for a couple reasons. 1) She used to attend Eastern Arizona College the home of the Fighting Gila Monster depicted on the shirt and 2) I don't like cap sleeves.

Recap
2007 was a great year. We saw McKay get bigger and funnier. We moved into our house. We had Gibson come into our family. We are very grateful and hope that 2008 brings even more fun - and less children than the previous 2 years.